Stormy Speaks

Stormy Weather is opry.com's exclusive columnist. A veteran, though self-described "young and trendy music industry insider," Stormy takes readers along as she moves gracefully within Nashville’s elite inner circles and shares her own first-hand observations, take-no-prisoners opinions and juicy commentary on the movers and shakers inside Music City's illustrious entertainment industry. Read it from Stormy like you won't read it anywhere else.

Stormy Sees Dolly Workin’ 9 to 5, Clint Gettin’ Fired

Stormy is fresh from her trip last week to New York City.  Oh, no, Stormy didn’t take just a bite out of the Big Apple.  She feels like she stuffed the entire apple into the designer knock-off handbag that she picked up for cheap in China Town.  As you probably remember, Stormy was in town for the opening of 9 to 5:  The Musical.  Oh, Lily Tomlin, Jane Fonda and of course the ever-delightful Dolly Parton were all in attendance.  The show is a jewel, but the real sparkler is Miss P’s music.  Oh, my!  Stormy’s not the only one who thinks so.  The Tony Award nominees were announced on Tuesday, and guess who’s at the top of the list with a nomination for Best Original Score (Music and/or Lyrics) Written for the Theatre?  Dolly, of course!  That’s exactly what she’ll be honored for if she wins when the Tony Awards are handed out on June 7 at Radio City Music Hall.  Oh, fingers and toes crossed; all of them!   

Country artists generally like boots, but gettin’ the boot is another story entirely.  It wasn’t “A Bad Goodbye,” but Clint Black did hear those famous words that no one wants to hear on the Celebrity Apprentice when The Donald informed him that he “was fired.”  Stormy is certainly no marketing expert, but she wasn’t optimistic for Clint and his country-infused Chicken of the Sea jingle.  Secretly, curled up on the sofa, Stormy was hoping someone might incorporate Jessica Simpson’s infamous “is it chicken or tuna?” debacle.  Oh, well. Thankfully, Clint didn’t quit his day job.  Stormy is delighted to learn that Trace Adkins will make a special guest appearance in the three-hour season finale on May 10.  It’s just as well that Clint got the pink slip because, had Trace been pro-Clint, it would have stirred up more controversy than Stormy cares to sift through. 

Speaking of sifting through, Stormy was wading through her emails when she discovered an official notification that Miss Reba McEntire is returning to the Opry stage on May 9.  Strange, no!  But Reba does have a new single that’s rising faster than the water in Stormy’s basement after all of the recent rain.  Reba debuted “Strange” on the ACM Awards last month.  Strange coincidence that she has a new soon-to-be-released album (Stormy’s told the album is due Aug. 18), her first in six years, as she makes her way back to the Opry stage?  Why of course not.  Artists who want to sell records know that the Opry stage is just the place to showcase their best to country’s best fans.  Stormy is going to use her inside connection (aka Stormy’s new boyfriend) to get backstage passes for the Opry show.  She’ll have all the scoop on this one, do not fear! 

Let’s recap a few things on Stormy’s summer “to do” list:  1) get a tan tailgating before taking in a Kenny Chesney concert  2)  get adopted by Taylor Swift  3)  offer to lighten the load for Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman by volunteering to babysit anytime  4) create a special group rate if the Urban/Kidmans can coordinate with the Williams/Paisleys—how sweet that Kimberly dreamed that they named their son Jasper, and then they did!  4)  convince network television to launch “Dancing with the Country Stars”  5)  call dibs on Chuck Wicks before his girlfriend Julianne Hough does.

So much to do and so little time to get it all done.  Stormy must say “ciao” for now, but she’ll be back in just two short weeks with the rest of her summer “to do” list.   See you then!